A Letter to the Me Who Used to Write Letters

Remember that episode of Friends when Ross and Rachel were on the verge of getting back together and she wrote him an eighteen page (“front and back!”) letter?

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There were masses of us who related, first-hand, to Rachel. If you want to find our kind now, we mostly exist in high schools and universities. We can also be seen working our first jobs in the real world and dating a string of What-Were-We-Thinkings. You see at least one of us on every rotation of The Bachelor. You know, the one who sits on her bed at night thinking about her feelings, trying to capture each nuance on the page for the man she loves, while the other contestants get drunk and scream at moths/spiders/anything that moves.

Confession: I was a letter writing gal in my youth. And now I would like to write a letter to that letter writing gal.

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Dear Me Who Used to Write Letters,

I know why you’re doing this. You have all of these pent up feelings that you’re afraid you will not be able to accurately describe during a discussion or an argument. You want so badly to be understood that you are taking an hour to put every thought and emotion onto paper in the hopes that [insert guy’s name here] will read it and finally get you. You just want him to know where you’re coming from. You want to feel understood.

I want you to know that I do get you and that, even when you embarrass us, I always understand where you’re coming from. But here’s the kicker: if you cannot verbally express how you feel in a manner that [insert guy’s name here again] can comprehend, there’s a good chance you aren’t compatible. If he isn’t listening to you or he’s making you feel like you’re crazy, then he should be kicked to the curb.

Real communication isn’t that hard.

All my love,

Future You

PS Hey, Past Me! Need a little pick-me-up tidbit from the future? Our boobs eventually shrink to a more manageable size–all on their own! High-five! 

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